Do you have low self-esteem? Learn how to boost your confidence with these simple tips.
Your self image is tied to what you feel others think of you. It is also influenced by your personality and whether you’re an introvert or extrovert, as well as the standards you set yourself; for example, whether you’re a perfectionist, a high achiever or whether you are laid back and tend to roll with the punches and are not easily stressed or fazed.
If you have low self-esteem, you come home from a party and worry that you spoke too much or said something stupid. At the heart of this is a deep-seated fear that somehow you don’t measure up or that people see your failings and think less of you.
1. Cut back on social media: Stop checking how many friends or followers people have. Don’t believe the hype. Remind yourself that what people post is based on the image they want to portray, but may be faked or embellished.
2. Treat yourself like a friend: Are you always hassling yourself for not being gorgeous, smart or motivated enough? “I ask women, would you put down your daughter, best friend or mother in this way? Of course not – so it’s obviously not okay to say these things to yourself,” says Sydney psychologist Jacqui Manning. “In the long term, critical self-talk can destroy self-respect and damage your self-image.”
3. Motivate the right way: Work out or lose weight to invest in a healthier, longer life, not because you hate your body. (Have you seen our Raw Fitspo page? That’s a good place to start)
4. Pat yourself on the back. Do this when you finish that report at work, donate clothes to charity or stay on a health kick for the week. It will help bolster your self-esteem.
5. Accept compliments: Say ‘thank you’ and avoid putting yourself down.
6. Think beautiful: Walk, talk and relate as though you’re that latest ‘it’ girl or you’re channelling Audrey Hepburn, and that’s how you will feel and appear.
7. Do a personal self-audit: Write a list of at least 10 things that you value and appreciate about yourself. Ask a friend and your partner to write a list of 10 things they love about you and write a list for them. Finally, write a list of the things you don’t like about yourself and re-frame them in a more positive way, e.g. ‘I am shy but that makes me a good listener.’
“When you notice your talents and abilities, over time you will come to realise that you have all the qualities that you admire so much in other people and that the only problem has been your inability to celebrate your own strengths and attributes,” Manning says.